⌘ CAN'T REMEMBER TO FORGET YOU.

[Deleted]

­If anyone was stoked right about now, it would be Hannah. She was full of excitement right about now, she almost couldn't handle it. She had returned to the ring after months of being out of action and she managed to pull off a win for her team. She honestly was expecting for the worse, but she pulled it off and it was just...she was in awe, that's all there was to it. It was so nice feeling so happy, she almost had forgotten what it was like to be super excited. Then only downside to it all, was she was terrified to come across Alexandria again, especially since they didn't kick it off so well the first time around. However, it was currently the least of her worries and nothing could ruin her happy moment.

The show had ended and Hannah was backstage, still dressed in her ring gear, as she just walked out of catering with a nice cold bottle of water. She had a smile on her face that just wouldn't leave and she continued to thank those who welcomed her back and congratulated her for her victory. This was such a great night, though she did sort of feel bummed for her two friends, Eric and Samantha, who didn't end on good terms for their match. So with that being said, she figured she could go and visit and make sure all things were good. No one wanted to experience a debut, much less make a return, and lose, so she was going to cheer them up like the friend she was.

Taking a sip of her water, she turned the corner to head to the Women's locker room, where she was sure Sam was hiding out, probably ready to head out of the arena for the night. But just before Hannah could turn the second hall that lead into the rooms, she came to a complete stop as she came across a very familiar face. Like her, this familiar face had also made their debut tonight and as much as she was intrigued to see where things would go if they ran into each other, she was sort of avoiding it, only because of the way things sort of ended for them. This person was no other than Eli Sykes, someone who was the most important person in her life. Someone who meant everything to her, until things happened. Hannah stood there, gulping as her eyes met his and she could barely make out any words.


H A N N A H ⌘ W A L T E R S
( – the beautiful and talented – )
"Eli.."

Hannah spoke softly, like she almost didn't believe it. She wasn't sure what to expect.

TBC: adam!
WORDS: enough
NOTES: it's been awhile!
OUTFIT: --
LYRICS: 'BLANK SPACE' BY TAYLOR SWIFT

[Deleted]

I almost forgot what this felt like. The goosebumps haven't gone away since I first walked into the arena tonight. It feels good to finally be home.

As I walk through the backstage corridors with my newly acquired teammate, Bill Ryder, we come come across many familiar faces as well as new ones, all welcoming us back.

Ryder:
"Alright man, I'm gonna go get myself a hot shower and get out of here. I'll see you in Australia, brother."

Sykes:
"You got it, man. Be safe."

Ryder and I share a short embrace before going our separate ways down the halls.As round a corner, there are those eyes...

Those eyes...
Those blue, soul piercing eyes.

"Eli.."

My heart sinks and my head begins to spiral out of control. I knew this moment was bound to come about since hearing of Hannah signing to EHWF. I just honestly didn't think it would happen so soon. My mind is racing at a thousand miles per hour and although it's a struggle, I somehow find the words to say.

Sykes:
"Hannah.."

"How have you been?"

Nervously, I await Hannah's response.

[Deleted]

There was a moment of silence between the two, after he had asked her how she was. Her mind was still processing all of this, and she could feel butterflies in her stomach, remembering everything. Not that she could forget. She glanced down for a moment, shrugging her shoulders a little.

H A N N A H ⌘ W A L T E R S
( – the beautiful and talented – )
"I've been well. Just you know, trying to get back into the ring and such."

She brought her eyes back to his, a small smile forming across her lips.

H A N N A H ⌘ W A L T E R S
( – the beautiful and talented – )
"What about you? How have you been?"

She bit down on her bottom lip, a little nervous, as she placed her hands on her hips.

H A N N A H ⌘ W A L T E R S
( – the beautiful and talented – )
"It's been awhile."

TBC: adam!
WORDS: enough
NOTES: it's been awhile!
OUTFIT: --
LYRICS: 'BLANK SPACE' BY TAYLOR SWIFT

[Deleted]

The way she bit her lip...

She always knew that it drove me crazy. 

"It's been awhile."

To say that it's been a while is an understatement. Hannah and I haven't seen each other, much less spoken to each other, for the better part of a decade. Six years to be exact. It may not seem like a long time, but it felt like an eternity to me.

Sykes:
"Yeah, it has, hasn't it?"

I glance down at her left hand and notice her wedding ring. Quickly I raise my eyes back to hers, hoping she didn't notice.

"But, not much has changed since you last saw me. I took five years off from competing to raise my daughter and make a better person out of myself. I came back from my hiatus and joined EHWF after Brandon, of course, suggested I try and work out a contract. How I've been though, is completely different."

Without any hesitation, I begin venting.

"I'm suffering from alcoholism, I'm always in pain and I recently came back from a three month injury leave after Connor Creed kicked my knee into oblivion. Now, here I am, just trying to remain optimistic."

I pause momentarily, not sure where I'm going with all of this. Assuming she's still interested in speaking with me, I quickly change the subject back to her, instead of continuing with my incoherent ramblings.

"So, what about yourself? How's life been treating you?"

"You look great."

Though i'm positive I just made this an extremely uncomfortable situation for her, the last thing I want is for her to leave.

[Deleted]

Hannah nodded her head, how long it truly had been since they've seen each other was crazy. Those were the longest years of her life. Especially the beginning, and anyone who has known Hannah, knew that it was rough. However, she managed to slowly get herself through it and it wasn't easy. The smile on her face grew a little more at the mention of his daughter, the sweetest little girl she had gotten to known over those six years.

H A N N A H ⌘ W A L T E R S
( – the beautiful and talented – )
"I'm sure she's growing up. I've missed her so much. But hey, glad to know you were able to work something out to come here. It's a great place. I know I'm glad to be here.."

She slightly tilted her head to the side, as she began to listen to him explain how he has been over these last few years. She couldn't help but let a sigh escape from her mouth, feeling bad for him. Hannah broke eye contact again, this wasn't exactly what she wanted to hear when it came to how he was doing.

H A N N A H ⌘ W A L T E R S
( – the beautiful and talented – )
"Eli, I'm so sorry...."

She wasn't sure what to even say at this point, because she couldn't help but wonder if she had any sorts of doing with any kind of problems he's had. She knows she had hurt him, and regretted it. Hannah quickly rid of those thoughts, as he brought her back to reality, asking how life was treating her.

H A N N A H ⌘ W A L T E R S
( – the beautiful and talented – )
"Thank you. Life...life has been alright, I guess I really can't complain. I've had my fair share of issues, but from own mistakes. Some thing I seem to be a pro at. I've taken some time off myself, to recuperate, but never for long periods of time. I seem to always be on the road, cause as tiring as it is, it's like an addiction. My life is the furthest thing from exciting and has pretty much been an emotional roller coaster, to tell the truth. Um..."

She glanced down at her hand, the very hand that she caught Eli glancing at.

H A N N A H ⌘ W A L T E R S
( – the beautiful and talented – )
"I managed to get myself married, haha. I guess you can thank Vegas and alcohol on New Years for that. Decided to just give it a shot, so here we are. He's a nice guy. So there's that."

It was kind of heartbreaking, the way she just spilled it out. And the last thing she wanted to do was rip out his heart and stomp on it.

TBC: adam!
WORDS: enough
NOTES: it's been awhile!
OUTFIT: --
LYRICS: 'BLANK SPACE' BY TAYLOR SWIFT

[Deleted]

Sympathy is the last thing I seek from anyone, especially from the people that are close to me, and even though Hannah and I hadn't spoke in so long, she knew me better than my own family. 

Sykes:

"Hannah, you don't need to apologize for anything. Any rough spots I've had in my life are from my own doing. I can't blame other people for my problems anymore. I am the epitome of an imperfect human being. The person you walked away from six years ago is not the same one you're speaking to now. I don't blame you one bit for leaving. I would have done the same thing. I was a poisonous person to be around and I drove you away. Do I regret it? Of course. But, I have to live with it..

Hannah begins speaking about her marriage. A feeling of nauseousness comes over me.

Man, did that hurt.

I want to be happy for her, but I can't.

But, I can't let her know, although I'm certain she does. I just have to keep a smile on my face and be a man.

Sykes:
"Married? Wow. Congratulations..

That's...

Great."

All I can do is call myself an idiot over and over again in my head.

"But, I'm glad he's nice. That's a great quality, as a person, to have..."

It's apparent that she catches the sarcasm in my tone of voice. I can't say these things with any sort of seriousness or enthusiasm. The thing I would most like to do is find this "nice guy" and put him out of his misery. But, I won't...

"So, where did you guys meet?"

[Deleted]

Though it was the last thing he wanted, she still couldn't help but feel bad for the things he's been through. She knew it had to be rough, and she could only imagine how rough it was going through it alone, or so she'd assume. Hannah sighed once more, shaking her head as he continued on. She couldn't help but feel a little bit depressed...

H A N N A H ⌘ W A L T E R S
( – the beautiful and talented – )
"I feel like I should, though. I mean, there's some things I feel like I could have been there for you, if I wasn't so stupid to walk away. But let me be the first to say, no one is perfect and I can definitely say from experience, I am far from it. Just please, quit blaming yourself for being the reason I left, and don't think it was because I stopped loving you. I got scared of what could be and I made the biggest mistake of taking off. I hurt you and for that...I apologize. "

There was so many things she felt like she needed to explain. There was so many things to be talked about. This run in took a different turn than she expected, and it definitely wasn't a bad thing. It was just sort of sad, because there was so much between them. That little smile reappeared as he congratulated her, knowing for a fact it crushed him.

H A N N A H ⌘ W A L T E R S
( – the beautiful and talented – )
"Thanks.."

She frowned, knowing he wasn't exactly enjoying this topic, and at this point, neither did she.

H A N N A H ⌘ W A L T E R S
( – the beautiful and talented – )
"Eli.."

Hannah knew what he was getting at and she knew he wasn't a fan of it at all. For a fact, she knew that if the two ever crossed paths, it wouldn't end so greatly.

H A N N A H ⌘ W A L T E R S
( – the beautiful and talented – )
"We met in --- actually, I'm pretty sure this isn't want you want to hear. In fact, I know it's the last thing you want to discuss. I don't want to put you through it."

It was true, she knew he didn't want to hear it. In his situation, could you blame him?

H A N N A H ⌘ W A L T E R S
( – the beautiful and talented – )
"I do know that there is still a lot to discuss. For me, anyway."

TBC: adam!
WORDS: enough
NOTES: it's been awhile!
OUTFIT: --
LYRICS: 'BLANK SPACE' BY TAYLOR SWIFT

[Deleted]

As much as I wanted to spill my guts and let her know how I really felt, I couldn't bring myself to do it. I'm not the same selfish person I was in the past. For the sake of her happiness, I'll hold my breath...

But for how long? 

Apparently not long at all...

Indeed, we did have a lot more to discuss. I'm sure the both of us have plenty of things we would like to say and hundreds of questions we would like answered.

Sykes:
"Look, you don't have to explain anything you're not comfortable with. I'm just glad you're doing good for yourself. As long as your happy, that's all that matters."

At a loss for words, I remove the black beanie from my head and run my hand through my hair. I'm still in a surprised state after running into her after all these years.

"I don't want to delve to deep into this, because I'm sure it's the last thing you want to hear from me, but I feel like it's something that needs to be out there..."

"When you left, it was easily the single hardest thing I have ever gone through in my entire life. Tougher than watching my father drink himself to death. More heart crushing than hearing my ex-wife, the mother of my child, tell me that she can no longer love a piece of shit like me. My life has not been glamorous by any means. I have been lower than dirt and kicked when I was down, but when you were around, it was like there was a meaning there. I'm not saying this to make you feel guilty, because trust me, you haven't done anything to feel guilty about. And your apology isn't necessary either. You know how the old saying goes... I made my bed."

"After everything I have done to hurt you, it doesn't change the fact that there are no words that could ever truly describe how much you meant, and still mean to me, Hannah. And that is from the bottom of my heart."

I pause for a moment to clear my throat.

"I know this is completely uncalled for and I shouldn't be saying this stuff to you. It's disrespectful to you and your husbands marriage, but honestly, I won't be able to hold this in, especially now that I'll be seeing you every week."

I stop myself before bringing myself any further embarrassment.

I look Hannah right in her eyes...

Those eyes...

Waiting for a response.

[Deleted]

Happy. As long as she was happy. But was she, though? She was having a hard time understanding and coming to the realization of some things over the last couple of months. She never understood why things were complicated, and to that, she slightly nodded her head with a faint smile as she mumbled one simple word.

H A N N A H ⌘ W A L T E R S
( – the beautiful and talented – )
"Yeah."

And then there it was. It was like her heart was shattered into a million pieces, listening to him try to open up. She couldn't help but to feel worse than she already did, and it wasn't his fault. She had her own part in this and now she could feel the tears that she was fighting back, it was so hard not to. There was so much between them and it was always on her mind and it hit her harder at this very moment.

H A N N A H ⌘ W A L T E R S
( – the beautiful and talented – )
"I know you say it's not necessary, but it it, Eli. I hurt you. I'm the one who ran off like a scared little girl when the time was getting tough. Things happen, but that doesn't mean we should run away from it. We were suppose to be a team. From the time we were together and everything I learned, I knew that things weren't so simple. It wasn't easy. But I was suppose to hold your hand and help you through it. I wanted to take it all away, but I messed up. I never looked back and I never checked in. I hate myself for it. All these years, it drove me crazy because that's what was always on my mind. I couldn't help but think of the what ifs. I would've given anything to see you again.  I knew what it was like to be left in the dark and I never wanted to do that, but I did it to the one person who meant everything to me. Maybe I shouldn't admit it all, as a married woman but.......you always hold a special place in my heart. As cheesy as it might sound."

That wasn't even the beginning of it all. She couldn't take her eyes off of his and she could just feel that vibe between them. She also knew she had some explaining to not only Eli, but someone else too.

H A N N A H ⌘ W A L T E R S
( – the beautiful and talented – )
"Well, I don't care. I want to know everything. It might be wrong, but we both deserve it, right? I was kind of hoping that maybe we could take this somewhere a little more private and talk. I mean, if you got somewhere else to be, I understand."

TBC: adam!
WORDS: enough
NOTES: it's been awhile!
OUTFIT: --
LYRICS: 'BLANK SPACE' BY TAYLOR SWIFT